Reunification Camp Survivor
Senate Testimony from San Diego resident, Mia, age 16. Mia is a survivor of Linda Gottlieb’s reunification camp, Turning Points for Families:
“The way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.” That’s the definition of a relationship.
My name is Mia, and my sister Ava and I have been victims of a reunification camp. From the beginning, I’ve been told that every parent should have the right and opportunity to have a relationship with their child - regardless of what damage they’ve done. While that’s correct to a certain degree, the thing people forget is relationships can’t be forced. No one can force a genuine connection with someone, not even a biological parent. Especially when abuse has occurred with that parent and the child is completely opposed to it. Things happening naturally and organically is the only way it will work. Not by shipping children off, unwillingly, to force them into compliance.
At Linda Gottlieb’s camp, Turning Points for Families, I was told that I was "alienated" from my biological father and the way they were going to fix that was by sending me to a camp with my abuser and cutting off all communication with my support system and family. So their plan was fixing “alienation” with alienation.
My experience at this reunification camp has greatly affected my life. Linda’s agenda has affected my life. Being left alone with no one to support me and help me through this trauma has affected my life. On top of all that my mental health has plummeted, but no one cared because as long as my biological father got what he wanted and Linda could say that her program was working, it didn’t matter what was really going on. It didn’t matter that even after the camp and after the 90-day black-out period, I still didn’t want anything to do with my father. Linda and those who supported this weren’t happy because they didn’t get the results they wanted. You should be asking yourself, why the results weren’t what Linda Gottlieb said they would be? Because this “program” does NOT work. No child I’ve ever talked to has said that being forced to reconnect with their abusive parent has actually made them want a relationship.
What’s worse than having your basic human rights taken away by being sent to this place, is what happens at this camp. You’re forced to stay with an abusive parent who doesn’t actually care about your well being, and you are forced to listen to this person claim to love you, make up excuses, blame you, call you crazy, belittle you, and tell you what you’re feeling is invalid and wrong. “Not normal” is what I've been told, as well. What is not normal, is this entire process. No child should be put through this abuse and left to unpack lifelong trauma.
I heard something that really stuck with me and I'd like to share it with you; “some of us may be physically free, but we’ll never be mentally free.” Ty Larson (Barricaded Siblings Turn to TikTok While Defying Court Order to Return to Father They Say Abused Them) said this and it deeply resonated with me. By allowing these reunification programs and camps to be legal, you’re allowing children’s rights to be stolen and you are condoning human trafficking. By not taking a stand against reunification camps, you are supporting the mental and emotional abuse of children, and you are complicit in our lifelong trauma. No amount of therapy will alleviate what we have lived through.
No real, loving parent would torture their child by sending them to these awful places. There are not enough words to express how deeply this experience has damaged my life. Ive been able to deal with everything that has happened to me fairly well these past few years, but there was something about being sent away that I really couldn’t handle. Having no sense of control, even over your own freedom, no option or choice but to do what these so-called “professionals” are telling you is “in your best interest,” sent me down a spiral of darkness, loneliness, fear, anxiety, and depression. By allowing these camps to continue you’re saying “yes,” to controlling and manipulating children. You’re agreeing with the abuse that is taking place and because of this, you have ownership in the trauma inflicted on me, my sister and countless other children.
You have the opportunity to make a change. You hold the power and the choice to help children who can’t help themselves right now. These children are dependent on you to do the right thing. You can’t just let kids age out of the system. You can’t let kids be taken from their families and put with their abusers. You can’t let kids continue to run away to avoid being sent to reunification camps. Kids are barricading themselves in homes, terrified that they will be taken by transport agents and sent to reunification camps, and fearing that they may never see their family again.
As a child, I should not have to advocate for myself but I don’t have a choice. Adults should be advocating for me, and I humbly ask for you to advocate for me and other children who are silenced. The extent that I have had to go to, is something that no child, teenager or young adult should ever have to experience. These camps need to be banned, there are no success stories and there are no positive outcomes, there is only trauma, sadness and resentment.
If you have a child, or even a child that you personally care about, would you want them to go through this experience? God for bid, the thought of your child being sent to a reunification camp was brought to fruition. Would you be OK with this being legal? Are you OK with knowing you had the choice to ban these camps, and that you didn't?
There aren't enough words, nor are there enough descriptors for me to fully express how this experience has affected my life. It has been almost six months since I was removed from my preferred parent, my mother. I am a 16-year-old girl, and I desperately want to be reunited with my mother. I want to resume a normal life versus the one that I have been court-ordered into. My sister and I are being robbed of a relationship with our mother, and our childhoods have been stolen. This is cruel and it should be illegal.
Thank you for your time, Mia, age 16.
