Divorcing A Narcissist: Attack of the Narcissist

I have personally debated on whether or not to share my most recent “Narc Attack” because I don’t want to give my X the attention that he craves and I know his family reads my blog.  My recent blog titled, “A Typical Narcissistic Email” generated so many messages and personal emails that I decided to spotlight this recent ‘Narc Attack’ in an effort to make other survivors feel less alone.The back story:  My blog, One Mom’s Battle, was featured in a Huffington Post article titled, “What Smart Women Do After a Divorce”.  It was great advice from Alison Patton, esq on how to persevere after the trials and tribulations of a divorce instead of being trapped in the victim-mode of self-pity.  The article was well-written and my blog was referenced as just one of many ways to cope with divorce.  I was honored but was also confident that the attention I received was enough to throw him over the edge.At our April court date, my X brought in his newly hired, well-known attorney and was successful in reversing the previous order which called for supervised visits.  I was dumbfounded and speechless.  The attorney kept him at bay and didn’t allow him to dig himself a deep hole.  Basically, the attorney did all of the talking and therefore, my X could not open his mouth and tell lies.  In true Narcissistic fashion, he was on top of the world because in his eyes, he won.  Winning to a narcissist is as important as breathing air.  It is essential to their survival.Within a week of his perceived “win” he was uncontrollably boasting his victory.  He fired off emails to claim his win to anyone who would listen.  He also went onto the Huffington Post and commented on the article which featured my blog.  The comment has since been removed by the Huffington Post for obvious reasons but I will share it with you today.###I am the Dad of the two beautiful daughters pictured for the world to see in Ms. Swithin’s blog.  The truth is the court has my daughters with me as much as my career allows.  Over three years, I have driven 416 miles to spend time with my children over 96 times.  The fact of the matter is my daughters love me very much.  I love them very much and they have never been harmed in any way while in my care.  Ms. Swithin is continuously perjuring herself in court.  She builds mountains out of mole hills and exaggerates virtually everything to a degree that I feel sorry for her.  She is a person suffering from a severe mental disorder of psychosis.This is caused by a disease of Systemic Lupus Erythematosus by a world re-known expert on autoimmune deceases.  Lupus or SLE is known to cause many side effects and psychosis is a well-documented side effect of this heart-wrenching disease.  Ironically, Ms. Swithin’s entire blog is a narcissistic statement.  The fact that she is selling it for $4.99 is simply deplorable.  I hope Ms. Swithin has the where-with-all to realize the people most adversely affected by this are two 5 and 7 year old daughters.  Truth is prevailing in the Court systems and more and more time is being granted as the misrepresentations to the court by Ms. Swithin continue to unwind.  Best Regards, The X      ###My response:There are 1,095 days in a three year period and out of the 96 visits that he is bragging about, we were left waiting in a Starbucks parking lot as he was too hung over to attend the visits or merely “forgot” about the visits.  I can think of a handful of visits total that were a positive experience and those were due to the fact that there were people around (birthday party, etc) to impress.  There is a reason that the court has allowed him to interact with our children for less than 9% of the past three years.  The positive side to the coin: I have had 91% of the influence in my daughters’ lives which I am incredibly thankful for.  They are active, social and happy little girls who are thriving despite what they have been through.I have never once perjured myself in court.  The mere suggestion is almost laughable given the fact that our Commissioner states at every court date that “Mr. X has lost all credibility in my courtroom”.  He has been caught outright lying to the Commissioner and if the Commissioner were to sit down with our two foot tall file of paperwork, he would see the lies and contradictions in every single paper he has ever filed.My favorite part of his comment is his new-found professional as both a Medical Doctor and Psychiatrist.  His personal ads online do list that he has a graduate degree so maybe it’s true?  (That was funny!)  He has not only taken it upon himself to change my medical diagnosis from Multiple Sclerosis (which I DO have) to Lupus (which I do not have) but he has now diagnosed me with psychosis.  Projection, anyone?I do agree that my need to make additional income to raise my daughters is absolutely “deplorable” and if his current child support arrears didn’t sit at $33,016.68, I probably would offer it up for free.  It is also deplorable that our system allows someone to live a life of luxury while not being current on support.I do agree with the X that the two people most affected by this are my daughters.  That is why I wake up every morning and fight to shelter them from a Psychopath/Narcissist.I also agree with his statement that truth is prevailing.