When Rules Don't Seem to Apply
At the young age of one, my daughters had rules to follow. They were simple things like not throwing the plate on the floor or not sticking my car keys into an electrical outlet. Regardless of how simple they were, they were rules. More rules fell into place as they progressed in age and now, at the ages of 5 (almost) and 7 (almost), they know what is allowed and they follow instructions.I find it hard to understand how small children can follow rules with ease (generally) yet a 38-year old man can't. I have to remind myself that he makes his own rules and is above other people's rules. Even though I have lived this for years and understand that he marches to the beat of his own drum, I still find myself dumbfounded when dealing with him. This is a man who has a degree in physiology/cell biology and claims to have a genius IQ yet he never ceases to amaze me with the choices he makes.Today was our first day of supervised visits and it went bad before it even began. Prior to the visitation, we each met with the Director of the program individually and she established the rules and boundaries that are in place. She notified us of the times for drop off, pick up, transitions, etc. These rules are in place to keep the girls from being traumatized or upset by me coming/going.We were both firmly told of the rules in person and by email:
12:40pm: The girls and I were to arrive at the pizza place to allow them 15-20 minutes to become acquainted with the Director.
1:00pm: I was to leave the restaurant.
1:05pm: He was to arrive at the restaurant.
3:00pm: His visitation ends/he departs the restaurant.
3:05pm: I arrive to pick up the girls.
Pretty simple, right?The girls and I arrived promptly at 12:40pm and as we walked into the restaurant, we saw him inside. The Director wasn't there yet. I opened the door, poked my head in and said, "You aren't supposed to be here yet". His response was something along the lines, ( with scowl on face), "It's a public place" as he threw his hand up in the air to show that I was ridiculous.The entrance to the restaurant had two doorways that you had to enter before going into the restaurant so the girls and I waited in the middle of the doorways until the Director arrived. She politely asked the girls and I to head to the restroom and went back out to tell him to leave the premises and return at the proper time.The worst part was seeing the girls so confused. They saw their dad but were forced into a bathroom. It was a bad situation that was so avoidable if only he could follow the very simple rules. The rules are in place to prevent situations like today. He is above rules and doesn't care at all how he affected the girls today or any day for that matter.He is that Narcissistic.
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