Torn
We were in court just last Wednesday and I asked for the current court orders to be modified.He fails to show up for visitation a lot lately and it is very difficult on my daughters. I asked that he be required to call us when he is actually at the pick-up location (Starbucks) and that we would drive down there at that point. The judge made slightly different orders. His orders were that "He" was to notify us 24-hours prior to each visitation if he planned to have the girls. This allows us time to make plans or to alter our plans if needed. It saves the girls from being disappointed constantly.I emailed him Wednesday night with the dates for the 2011 visitations and re-caped the details from court-- specifically the 24-hour notification order. He was supposed to notify us by 10am on Friday morning. Friday morning came and went-- no notice. I finally sent an email on Friday afternoon (4pm) asking whether or not he planned to pick up the girls-- no response.I checked my email several times this morning-- still no notification. A complete violation of court orders. Scheduled pick-up time was 10am. 10:05am-- he began calling my phone. Several times. 10:30am he emailed-- one of his normal, attacking rants.I was torn. Do I follow court orders or do I let him continue to operate with no regard for the judge, court or orders? If I do not hold him to the orders then in essence, I am also violating the orders. His mother began texting me. He began denying the order existed and created his own version of the order. I sent him an email stating that I would make an exception this time however, moving forward I planned to follow the order as stated.I sit here listening to Pandora radio as I type this blog. A song came on that is very dear to my heart-- John Mayer's "Daughters". It makes me cry every time I hear it. Fathers have such a huge impact on the lives of their daughters. In our situation, that isn't a positive thing. It makes me want to work extra hard to be a strong role model for my daughters-- to counter the negatives that lie ahead of them.Sometimes it feels like it will never end.It feels like he will never change-- and always feel above the law and above court orders.###One Mom's Battle: Our mission at One Mom’s Battle is to increase awareness of Cluster B personality disorders (Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder) and their impact upon shared parenting and the Family Court System which includes Judges, CPS workers, Guardian ad Litems (GAL), Parenting Coordinators (PC), Custody Evaluators, therapists and attorneys. Education on Cluster B disorders will allow these professionals to truly act in the best interest of the children.History of One Mom's Battle: In 2009, One Mom’s Battle began with one mother, (Tina Swithin), navigating the choppy waters of a high-conflict divorce in the Family Court System. Since then, it has turned into a grassroots movement reaching the far corners of the Earth. Tina's battle spanned from 2009 - 2014 during which time she acted as her own attorney. Ultimately, Tina was successful in protecting her daughters and her family has enjoyed complete peace since October 2014 when a Family Court commissioner called her ex-husband a "sociopath" and revoked his parenting time in a final custody order.Tina Swithin: Divorcing a narcissist? Tina Swithin's books are available online at Amazon (print, Kindle or audio format). Each year, Tina offers life-changing weekends of camaraderie and healing at the Lemonade Power Retreat. Tina also offers one-on-one coaching services and a private, secure forum called, The Lemonade Club, for those enduring high-conflict custody battles. [wp_ad_camp_1]