Obeying Orders

As I prepare my case for upcoming court date, I needed to obtain the reports from the company who supervises my X's visits.

There have been a total of three visits- only two hours each visit.  My fear in the beginning was that my X would put on a huge act in an effort to win the Father of the Year award.  Since the visits are only two hours in length, I didn't anticipate that a lot could go wrong.  Being that these reports are now in the hands of the court, the girls' attorney, my X's possession and in my possession... it makes them public record.  Because of that, I feel comfortable talking about them in very general terms.

Apparently, I was wrong.  A lot can go wrong in a total of six hours.  It worries me that he didn't try to put on a show as it makes me question his state of mind.

• He was 20 minutes early to the first visit which started everything off poorly for the girls and I.  He had strict orders to arrive on time.  He had to be asked twice to leave.

• According to the report, he ordered his favorite pizza (chicken garlic pizza) without thinking of the girls which means they barely ate anything.  They are like most children-- cheese or pepperoni.

•  He had to be reminded to not use his cell phone.

• Late to second visit- with no explanation.

• He sat and drank coffee while socializing with another father for 20 minutes of his two-hour visit.

• Had to be reminded that there are no cameras when he tried to take a photo.  (This makes me so angry because I know those photos would have promptly been posted on Facebook to keep up his facade).

• Arrived late to the third visit- with no explanation.

• On the report, it was noted that, "Dad does not interact much with girls as they play".

• He brought a family member to the visit (against the rules) and then denied that they were related when asked three separate times.  This was his sister-in-law (brother A's wife) and nephew.

Once again, it is a bag of mixed emotions.  If you were to reach in the bag, you would find sadness because my daughters deserve SO much more than this.  You would also find shock.  Even when I don't think I could possibly be shocked anymore, I am proven wrong.  You would also find confusion.  It's difficult to understand.  If I hadn't seen my children for six weeks, you wouldn't find me drinking Starbucks and socializing with an adult for 20 minutes.  You would have to peel me off of my children.  Inside my bag of emotions is also anger.  Anger because these reports show his true colors.This isn't about our daughters...it's about his need to beat me in court.    It's also about saving face with his mom who he can't possibly disappoint.

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