August 10, 2011–I sat in court- again. I remember how nervous I was before each court date. There were times when friends would go with me and there were many times that I went alone. I would cling to my little bottle of Bach Rescue Remedy which is a homeopathic stress relief concoction. Four drops directly under your tongue– there were times when I wanted to drink the whole damn bottle. Four drops should suffice for normal stress– this didn’t feel normal.
On this particular day, my rock (aka Significant Other) went with me. I had never brought him into court prior to this but no one else could attend and I needed him there. I needed someone to remind me to breathe. It seems simple, right? Inhale…exhale. Repeat. It isn’t always that simple.
The court ordered an attorney to represent my children– someone who could dig deep and get to the bottom of the issues. I was beyond ecstatic. I felt like the Family Court Services’ Parenting Evaluation had failed us for many reasons. The evaluator was sold on his charm even with piles of evidence– she bought the story that everyone buys. He is the ultimate salesman which has been my biggest obstacle through our divorce.
He didn’t adhere to the restrictions in the Parenting Agreement and there were zero ramifications. Zero. I was clinging to the hope that this was the final ticket. I filed a plea with the court: please, please grant Minor’s Counsel to represent the girls. I felt like it was my last hope. I sat in the courtroom and listened to the judge approve my request. I felt like jumping up and down right there in the courtroom. This was a well-known attorney– the best money could buy if you were seeking a divorce attorney.
Our next court date was scheduled for August 31, 2011.
I met with the attorney who was appointed to represent my daughters. He listed to my concerns. He asked all of the right questions. I was hopeful. I was organized– I had my 3″, pink binder and everything was labeled and in order. I had been waiting for this moment for so long. He asked me to email him additional information on several topics that we discussed. I agreed. His job was to call everyone who knows us: teachers, principals, nannies, babysitters, marital therapists and friends.
I went home that night and I stayed up until 1:30am compiling everything he asked for. I emailed it along with contact information for all of the above-mentioned people. Then…I waited. I wondered. I waited more. I was getting anxious. The court date was approaching and my daughter’s teachers still had not heard from his office. Our former live-in nannies had not heard from him. No one had been called.
One particular visitation before court, he (my ex) was refusing to tell me where the children were going to be residing in his care. He was due to pick them up at 3:30pm. I reached out to the attorney for assistance. The attorney called me back at 3pm and expressed frustration with his lack of cooperation– I told him that he thrives on causing me to worry about my daughters. He agreed that it seemed to be the case. He didn’t understand why it was so difficult for him to simply tell me where my children were going to reside.
August 30, 2011— The day before court and still no one had heard a word from his office. I couldn’t figure out what was happening. I didn’t understand. This was the person who was supposed to be working in the best interest of my daughters. At 5pm, the night before court, I received a call. He asked if it was okay to postpone the court date– to ask for a continuance.
I was relieved. My greatest fear was the attorney going into the court with limited information. I was confident that now he would contact all of the people who knew us– who could attest to my concerns. People who could verify my claims.
Court was postponed until Wednesday, September 14th, 2011.