Divorcing a Narcissist: Waiting on A Judgement

Divorcing a Narcissist: Waiting on A Judgement

I sit here waiting on a Judgement and I am thankful for a really busy work day (and week) to keep me distracted.

My X admitted to Minor’s Counsel that he has taken the girls’ cell phone during visits.  He admitted to doing this once and when this statement is processed in the Narc Decoder, it means once every singe visit.  I received a call from Minor’s Counsel on Friday night and he said that my X’s excuse from taking the cell phone from the girls was a result of my constant interference in his parenting time.  According to him, I am texting or calling constantly during the visits.

I had a simple solution: I would do actual screen prints of every time my daughter used her phone dating back to January 2012.  I logged onto the phone website and was delighted to discover that the texts and phone calls can be broken down for easy reading and printing- very user friendly.  I took all of the records and the actual phone to the attorney’s office and dropped them off on Monday morning.

Upon review of the attorney’s summary of the current issues this morning, here is what he stated, “The records provided by (Tina) are not consistent, with the (X’s) recitation of the number of contacts between the children and their mother, during visits”.

In other words: He is lying. Again.  Shocking.  I know.

Summary of past four  months of these “constant” interruptions of his parenting time:

  • June 2012: One call and one text from my daughter.  One text reply from me.
  • July 2012: Zero phone calls from either of us.  Two texts from my daughter- one telling me how many books she had read and another saying they were going to a park.
  • August 2012: One call that my daughter made at her father’s request to see if they could stay late at a party.
  • September 2012: No phone calls- no text messages.  At all.

Minor’s counsel went on to suggest that a new Custody Evaluation is probably in order.  Cheers to that!

Our last parenting evaluation was done in the beginning of 2010.  I didn’t know what I was dealing with and it was my word against his.  Now there are mountains of evidence, declarations, affidavits and I know exactly what I am dealing with.  There are also two new alcohol offenses and more lies than I can count.  There are two child welfare reports.  The most important part: the girls are old enough to speak up and voice their opinions, fears and desires.

Fingers crossed.  Still waiting on the Commissioner’s final decision.  ###

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9 Responses

  1. Keeping my fingers crossed for you too. It’s hard when it is your word against his. And boy do they lie!!!! I’m glad for you that your children can voice their fears. Keep us posted.

  2. Good luck! It’s always such a relief when the actual facts can be proved and tell the real story.

    LOL @ narc decoder. Someone should invent narc decoder rings, they’d make a fortune.

  3. Best of luck! I hope the court does the right thing and protects the girls. He sounds like a complete lunatic and shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near the girls until he learns to control his abusive behavior. And we all know how good narcs are at self-reflection and learning… not! Anyway, good luck!!!

  4. My XN would take our daughter’s phone and put it on top of his fridge where she couldn’t reach it. It would stay there for her entire visit. He used the same excuse, that I was interfering with his parenting time. I love the phone records, you’d think that being as smart as they think they are that they would think of that.