I remember how “special” that a Narcissist can make you feel. I remember feeling like the most beautiful girl in the world during our courtship and by the end of our marriage, I could barely look at myself in the mirror. He pointed out my every flaw –sometimes in a very passive aggressive way and sometimes in a direct and down-right mean way.
In the beginning, you feel so special and will do anything for these men. Case in point: Suzanne Shaw. Ms. Shaw sent me two messages this week through my blog defending Peter Cook with every ounce of her being. Suzanne Shaw went so far as to say that Peter Cook was NOT a Narcissist and that he only has narcissistic tenancies. Yes, she actually said that. Maybe Suzanne missed the Today Show interview where Peter Cook actually admits that being a Narcissist makes him a better dad. In her message to me, Suzanne said, “You are so blind” and then went onto say that she, “feels sorry for me”.
The court-appointed psychiatrist, Dr. Stephen Herman, said in the court proceeding, that Peter Cook is an “insatiable narcissist”. Dr. Herman recommended that Brinkley get full custody of the kids because Cook is a narcissist who has demonstrated “poor judgment.” He then went on to cite Cook’s 35 sexual partners, a two-hour-a-day internet porn habit and his “impulsive, self-destructive, possibly compulsive” affair with a teenager.
Marriage material? Hmm….
The other thing that never ceases to amaze me is the way that all Narcissists seem to come from the same mold. There are slight variations almost like you would find with a batch of cookies but basically, there are common threads that I find with every woman that I speak to. Over the past six months, I can’t count the number of times someone has said, “I feel like I just read my life story when I found your blog“. It’s the same cycle each time. They just insert a new woman and press “repeat”. For now, Suzanne is feeding Peter’s narcissistic supply by believing that he is the victim and that she is protecting his image at every turn. She feels special because he is making her feel that way. She believes his stories and has bought into each one of them.
I harbor no hard feelings towards Suzanne. God knows I have been in her shoes and defended my X at any mention of his wrongdoing. As I’ve said before, I am thankful that Suzanne has many resources available to her when she needs them. It is a matter of time before the tides will turn and she will understand Narcissistic Personality Disorder at a very intimate level. When that time comes, Suzanne, I can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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