One Mom’s Battle Has Many Faces: #15

One Mom’s Battle Has Many Faces: #15

Note from Tina: Each week I hear from more and more people who were once victims of a Narcissist, Sociopath or other Cluster B Personality Disorder.  One Mom’s Battle has many faces and its my honor to share them with you.  My healing comes from sharing my story and from hearing your stories.  There is power in numbers and our numbers are growing.  It is my hope that this little “village” will be one strong voice which provides education to our court system and most importantly, brings change to our Family Court System. 

Some of these stories are difficult to read such as this one.  Only the victims of a Narcissist can comprehend the horrific nature of the existence this woman is currently living:

One Mom’s Battle Has Many Faces: Here is Face #15

About 9 months ago I asked my husband for a trial separation because we were both miserable. We had an argument. He told me to get out and when I went to pack, he threw my clothes out the window into the mud below. I tried to return but he bought a gun and filed a false restraining order, thereby keeping me from the house and almost ALL of possessions.

He agreed once to let me get my belongings but I returned to find my things in piles all over the house– and he had urinated on them. The police gave me thirty minutes to get my belongings so I got what I could. I rented a small one bedroom apartment with only an air mattress and a coffee pot as possessions. He then violated his own restraining order by showing up at my apartment. He got my new address by using my social security number to access my cell phone account online.

Since that time he has called and emailed all my friends, family and acquaintances telling them that I am psychotic, delusional, a drug addict and on psychiatric medication. He has sent flyers to everyone in the neighborhood telling them I am a fornicator and included my picture and a photo of my car.

He mailed me a Mother’s Day card with a photo of my beloved dog of 16 years.  He knew that I was heartbroken over putting my dog down in January of this year.  On the card he wrote, “Mommy, why did you kill me?”

He used my friends wife’s obituary picture as his Facebook profile picture.  She passed away from cancer three years ago.

He keyed my brand new car.

He posted my cell number online and I currently received over 50 calls a day from sales people.

He super-glued my door lock and the entire door had to be removed and replaced.

He wrote a letter to my dead cousin’s wife telling her that I thought she had murdered him and I was trying to get her put in prison.

He still won’t agree to let me have my things and I am sure he has thrown away or destroyed my things induing my baby pictures, personal pictures and family heirlooms.

I fully expect him to post details of a sexual assault from a few years online because I only told a few people and he knows it would hurt me.

I asked my attorney how to deal with him. He said my best bet is to change my name and move far away.

He’s a narcissist, but how do I know? He’s the text book example of such a “perfect person” that he knows I definitely would have to be crazy or drug addicted to leave such a wonderful man as him.


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11 Responses

  1. Tina, this poor woman is dealing with a psychopath. This is stalking behavior and she needs to seek professional help on how to deal with stalking. Her attorney is right, though, that the best thing she can do is change her identity and move far away. Forget the possessions and family heirlooms – those are in memory forever and while they may not be able to be replaced – SHE cannot be replaced. From my understanding, this kind of behavior usually only gets worse (physical harm). Move away, and seek professional support. Document everything to build a case.

  2. It does not sound like children are involved, Praise the Lord. I know this is easier said than done, it is a hard time to turn your back on everything. The best thing would be to cut your losses(if you consider it that). I am not sure you could move far enough away from an NP, but it sounds like anything would be better than the way it has been for her.

  3. I pray for this victim. Her ex is the type of N in the same family as Drew Peterson, Scott Peterson, Brian David Mitchell and Josh Powell. This man is following in the same footsteps and I just read an article about how predictable these types are who end up committing murder (please feel free to edit out the link if you are not ok with it Tina, but it’s a very good article).

    This victim needs to get far, far away and never, ever have any contact with this man again. Her story sent chills down my spine. When one has lost this much control (that is documentable and can get him put in prison) there is no saying what he will do next.

  4. This lady needs us to send her pixie dust. Actually, she probably needs invisible making dust. Document, document, document, and move far far away.

  5. Thank goodness no children are involved. She can escape where most of us here are tied to them forever.

  6. Wow. Oh honey,

    That’s a story to make the rest of us re-think our situation.

    Thank God it was only psychological abuse and a few broken bones, right?!

    If you ever need to talk further sweetie, you are welcome to message me on Facebook: Blue Eyes and Bruises.

    I’ll be praying for you.

    But seriously—get far, far away from this guy.


  7. Oh my God.

    I do not want to hear about this woman on the news.

    I didn’t think that there was anything left that could shock me.

    Please let her know that everyone here wants her *safe* and wishes every good thing for her to get safe and start over.

  8. I agree with what everyone posted above. Thank goodness you can afford an attorney. Hopefully your lawyer will be able to get you through the divorce process quickly, and not allow this person to drag it on in his attempt to control you. Your real friends and family will see through his defamation of your character. All of our thoughts and prayers are with you, #15.