Today’s Court Battle: The Outcome

Today’s Court Battle: The Outcome

Written in court at 8:30am:

I didn’t sleep much last night. A lot of anxiety. A lot of tossing and turning. 

I am sitting in court waiting for our case to be called.  I would be a liar if I said I wasn’t scared.

The thought of my daughters going to an unsupervised visit with my X terrifies me.

I have done everything I can do.  Now it is in the hands of the judge and the attorney who was appointed to represent my daughters. I pray that they protect my girls.

While I sit here, I’ve prepared a statement to read to the court:

I would like to go on record and state that I am extremely concerned about the safety of my daughters while in my X’s care.  I have watched X spiral out of control over the past four years.  I am concerned about his mental stability.  I am so concerned about my personal safety and my children’s safety that I have retained a private investigator. 

My X has no regard for the court orders or the laws.  He has no regard for the well-being of my daughters.  I plead with the court to order supervised visitation.



The judge looked through the evidence and made a statement about imposing supervised visits.  He then said we would be taking a recess.  I was hopeful.

Court adjourned and my X went into “sales mode”.  He is good at what he does.  He makes a six-figure income when employed as a sales person.  He is also a master manipulator.

He read a statement that was clearly written by his Aunt, a court-advocate for children or his mother.  In the letter, he admitted to his drinking issues and claimed that he has enrolled in a DUI course.  He spoke of glittery parenting classes where he “has plans” to enroll.

I read my statement.  The attorney who represented the girls stated that he recommended supervised visitation or shorter, daytime visits.

The judge ruled: visitation reinstated.  No supervision required.

I am devastated.

Today, my heart hurts and I am angry.  What does it take to obtain supervised visitation?

How badly does this man need to hurt my daughters before the court acts?  That is my question.

Our system needs to change.

18 Responses

  1. It is a very broken system. Where did we get the idea that because someone contributed to the genetic information of (procreated) a child that they have the innate right to see that child and be a part of their life?

    In some cases, the kids would be a LOT better off without that person in their life.

    I’m sorry. My heart hurts for you and your children.

  2. What does it take? So sorry that the judge went against you. My thoughts are with you and I hope, as said above, your PI finds something. My heart goes out to you and your girls!

  3. Ugh! This makes me sick to my stomach. I’m so sorry about that judge’s frustrating inability to make an accurate assessment.
    I want to encourage you that whatever happens, God is in control. When we’ve done all we can, we can safely surrender the rest to him. Think Daniel in the lion’s den.
    That’s not to say everything works out the way we want, or even that bad things don’t happen to good people. It does mean that God is working out his will, and we know he loves your daughters more than any of us can grasp. He has an amazing power to transform afflictions into tools of growth and sanctification.
    Keep praying, and don’t be discouraged. Dig in for the “long haul,” and your girls will see God’s faithfulness and overcoming power in ways you never expected. I’ve seen this in my own situation.

  4. Oh My God. I am left without words. I am so sorry for you and your daughters. You sound like a fighter so I know you will appeal or find another way. Best of Luck to you.

  5. I haven’t decided what I am going to do as of yet. I am not one to “sit back” and go along with something that isn’t right.

    For right now, I am turning to the media to bring attention to my case and others. Are the judges waiting for another Susan Powell tragedy? Is that what it takes to get them to listen?

    So frustrating.

  6. I am so sorry. My ex is very much like yours. He beat me senseless and left me with multiple health issues. And the courts feel that even with all he did, he is safe to have our child. Frustrating!!

  7. Tina, I am so sorry for your outcome. My heart utterly breaks for you. How much, must one endure? I just don’t even know what to say. I am shocked at the courts disregard for human life. I have to go to court soon too for pretty much the same thing. The system is shocking.

  8. You will win the war Tina . We will pray for the well being of the girls. I am so proud of you . You are such a wonderful mother to those beautiful baby girls . I love you , hold fast ,,, Dad

  9. So the last court victory was just no overnight visits? So you are still having to fight every step of the way? Oh, Tina, I am so sad for you! My heart hurts for your precious little girls. 🙁 *hugs* Let me know what I can do. Write letters, bang a drum, scream from the rooftops? Channel that anger and you can move mountains…

  10. I can not believe the outcome! How unbelievably frustrating for you. 🙁 You’ve proven already how smart and strong you are, what a wonderful mother you are, and I have no doubt you will undo what this judge has done.

  11. I’m so pissed for you and your girls right now. I hate to suggest something that costs $$, but can the investigator “supervise” from afar? Keep building evidence. Keep every text the girls send you, any voice mail they leave you, write down everything they tell you when they return. It’s unfortunate that our system assumes that someone with the physical ability to procreate automatically deserves the title of parent.